As you know i had an ectopic last year that was a terrifying wake up call. Having never been ill ( touch wood) i discovered my body could try and end me in the most surprising of ways. Obviously it didn’t succeed ( in your face Fallopian tube!) but like all good villains it will try again . . or had a 20% chance of trying again. So as soon as Dr Iain confirmed i was indeed 100% up the duff i was booked in to the WUME ( pronounced womb, love it!) for a scan to check that everything was as it should be and in the right place.
sounds easy, no stress, just rock up, put the devilishly sexy cotton gown on ( be super grateful said gown doesn’t have an open back for my butt to hang out off) and wait to see another lovely doctor.
So DDH and I set off for the scan and i’m not going to lie. I was pretty scared. Thought I must have had a million butterflies for lunch as my tummy was fluttery and my mouth was all dusty and dry. But we got in there and Dr Amanda pulled out (what i like to call) the butter churner. It’s a rather daunting little probe that i’m sure features in many an alien abduction nightmare. But she had the good grace to buy me dinner and use a bit of lube so it wasn’t too awful and then suddenly we could see on the screen what was going on inside.
“I can see it” she said and we both made uh-huhing noises . . .. and then . . . “its in the right place”. After a bit more mouse clicking and some turning of the churn we got a close up so we could see the flicker of a heartbeat and a full TWO THUMBS UP!
Ladies and Gents, i’m not ashamed to say. I wept like a small child when bambi’s mam got shot. I was delighted I was getting it right. My body and I were doing it right. I was so horribly afraid that this most basic of biological feats was beyond me and that I was destined to fail over and over again. DDH looked like he was going to explode and he squeezed my hand and just said that as long as I was healthy and ok everything else would be just the icing on the cake.
So there it is . . looks a bit like the lion king. big head and a bit of a tail, same size as a grain of rice and yet . . future president of the universe? bringer of world peace? all our hopes and dreams in one tiny space.